Finding our way . . .


War is always a failure of leadership. Violence, always a failure of creativity.

When we can experience failure without judgement, we will be closer to overcoming both.

A failure of creativity comes from a lack of resources. Not just a lack of basic need resources, we can still be highly creative without those ( it is an awesome and potent human quality). No, it’s a lack of deeper resources, inner resources depleted from the outside by other humans through imbalance of power.

Some times the only way to rebalance the power, is through the use of force. And, force is dangerous. It’s one of the most dangerous tools we can access. It takes great skill to use force lovingly. We must always be careful when we use force to rebalance power they we don’t become what we were trying to escape. That we don’t take it inside us. It takes great wisdom and skill.

The current evidence would indicate we do not collectively possess this level of wisdom and skill. We must find the courage to practice. We must concern ourselves with the safety of our spirits, must do more to protect against the separation from self. And from each other. And from Earth. We will never find the peace or security we seek otherwise.

These are not leading questions. I don’t offer them with a pre determined answer. We will and do encounter countless complex conflicts. These are orienting questions for when we feel confusion, or when we need more information. Like moon light in the dark of night, these questions help make sense of the shapes we see.

They also reinforce our sense of connection. Help us recognize our own position of power. Positions of power change with context. If we are practicing presence we are more likely to recognize these changes and support ourselves. Our goal should always be powering with. Remembering that protects our cause and our spirits.

What are Boundaries? And why is it a cultural problem?

Oppression =Disrespected Boundaries = Oppression

Oppression is a boundary issue, an issue of disrespect on behalf of the oppressor.

Racism is a boundary issue.

Misogyny is a boundary issue.

Ableism is a boundary issue.

Homelessness and hunger are boundary issues,issues of disrespect for the unhoused or hungry person.

Boundaries are natural and organic. They are not “established”. They exist all on their own around needs of humans and all entities. Disrespecting the boundaries, disregard and neglect, is what causes issues.

As individuals, we are told to we need to speak up more, tell people about your needs or just say no more often, that may all be true. But, dominant culture doesn’t really want us to speak up. We have been trained and conditioned not to, and to not notice the disrespect. Dominant Culture is not a culture of wellbeing. And in order to maintain order, a system of separation has been cultivated. Inability to recognize these organic boundaries serves that purpose. Keep everyone separate. Don’t allow deep attachments, don’t allow needs to be met.

Look, we have spoken about our needs. Health care, child care. Housing, food. Who doesn’t know these needs exist? Who considers them disrespected boundaries? Why do we not discuss racism and biases as issues of disrespect?

We do not need to learn to tend our own boundaries just to protect ourselves from oppression and overreach. Not just to say no when necessary or express our needs. NO. We need to learn to recognize and tend the boundaries to mend the space between us. To learn to cultivate more nurturing relationships with our children. With our partners. We need to recognize and tend these boundaries so that we respect them as consumers, as community members, as friends, as teachers, and employers. Together, we must learn to engage ourselves and our systems differently. Each and every one of us. Absolutely no one is excused.

If you don’t recognize the boundaries, you will disrespect them; yours and those of others and Earth.

The Tending Tender Boundaries Program starts in February. Learn more

Private sessions are also available. Please contact me for more information.

The risk of being alive.

We collectively wander about wringing our hands or disassociating or bypassing, and very few of us have tried actively engaging. Very few of us move healthfully towards conflict. We have so many conflicts brought about by our lack of presence, and we keep trying to find new and fancy solutions to those individual problems. Yet, if we just worked on healing our sense of presence, many if not most of the most pressing problems we carry today ( both personally and as a society) would organically resolve. 

Unless you develop the capacity to be present with suffering, you can never be fully present with anything else. Because your nervous system will always be holding you back from accepting the emotional risk of being alive. 

This translates into disrespecting your boundaries and the boundaries of others to maintain a comfortable distance from the risk. This has an effect on our personal and social relationships. Over generations, this has an effect on culture. Dominant Culture today thrives on avoiding suffering, discomfort, and conflict.

We practice patience with suffering not to persist in a state of pain, but to access the clarity, creativity, and courage necessary for opening to healing and actions to alleviating suffering (compassion).

Can you genuinely be yourself? 

Presence is allowing your mind, body, heart, and environment to freely communicate. Allowing your internal and external environments to communicate allows you to be part of the physiological experience of the world. To belong. To yourself, to another, to humanity, to Earth, to the universe. Some of belonging is the vulnerability and presence to show up, and another part is to be accepted. We must all be doing our part to be actively present on both sides of this reciprocal exchange. 

Chronic Stress is what removes us from a natural state of presence but we won’t be able to access states of calm and relaxation without addressing the root cause. We need to heal our capacity to be present. There is no relaxing without presence. Presence requires we work physiologically with our nervous systems and how our nervous systems relate within our internal and external environments. We can’t just piecemeal the parts we like of this practice, because that only emboldens our current strengths and weaknesses. We need to be playing at the edges, start strengthening the capacities we have been compensating for. This will be uncomfortable! We need to practice with our capacity for suffering. We need to get comfortable with the risk of being alive.

Or we will miss our chance. And we will miss a lot of other beautiful things along the way. 

SOUNDheart Zoom Lunch Dates, Mondays 1pm ET ZOOM beginning January 9th 

Join Sherene for lunch over zoom on Mondays for discussion and practices regarding our ability to maintain emotional integrity, moral courage, and attunement while engaging with personal, social, political, economic, and ecological conflicts. Part of The Whole Health Center’s Membership Program

For the next several months we will be working with the concept of Presence. Each month we will focus on one of the 10 aspects of healing presence. Weekly discussion, meditation, and takeaway practices will be provided.

January: What is presence?

February: Non-Judging

March: Patience

April:Beginner’s Mind

May:Trust

June: Non-Striving

July:Acceptance

August:Gratitude

Sept:Generosity

October:Compassion

This program is also available in private sessions, please contact me for more info. 

6 ways to tend your nervous system in trying times

For me, my personal practice is grounded in my commitment to the whole. My personal practice is grounded in my commitment to be of service. In order to maintain my moral courage and emotional integrity in trying times, I work to prepare for hardship. Not in a pessimistic "life is hard" kind of way, more in a relevant reciprocal communication kind of way. Being present with the world right now calls me to be aware that there is a need to prepare my body, mind, and spirit to manage difficult things. So, that is what I do. And I can do that in joy and with joy because my practice also supports me holding the infinite vastness of emotions, together. 



We do a lot of work to support ourselves in this way at The Whole Health Center, but the SOUNDheart program has this as the defining purpose. The SOUNDheart program offers a space for practicing integrative practices in connection with our grief and anticipatory grief related to the trying times we are living and the days to come. If you worry about the days to come, this program is for you. I hope you will join us this Sunday at 4pm. We always gather for discussion, a guided meditation practice, and some take home practices for the coming month. This week I will offer one of my favorite guided meditations, one I think will give us something to hold and work with as we navigate Spring. 

SOUNDheart is a part of The Whole Health Center's membership program. Members have access to the link through the membership page. More about membership

With Love and Gratitude, 
Sherene

Additional resources for the slides above:

Yawning: 
For more information on the benefits of yawning reference the work of Andrew Newberg and Mark Robert Waldman 

Jump, Stomp, Swing: 
Example of quick movement activity here https://vimeo.com/374379276

Sense of Connection:
Access the Everyday Spirituality Tool from The Nurtured Life  https://static1.squarespace.com/static/55aedb4fe4b0f3d81650f710/t/5a969f6671c10b4fee4e6c96/1519820646743/experiencing+spirituality+everyday.pdf